From as early as I can remember, I dreamed of being a captain of a ship. To be out there on the Ocean in the middle of the night, navigating by the stars. I always thought it would be the greatest life on Earth.
Through my journey I’ve came across many mentors and personal leaders along the way. Some employed as Captains, some Artist, and some Philosophers. For the sake of this blog, I will honorably mention Odysseus. Odysseus was a Greek God as well as a very intelligent man. He is most famous for the Odyssey, a ten year trip returning back home. See, Odysseus played a major role in the Trojan war, but his most challenging objective was not the pursuit of being victorious in the Trojan war, but it was his return from the war! He spent a decade fighting, but his biggest battle was finding his way back home. How weird is that? I admire him for his life lessons I can learn from. Life isn’t always about accomplishing your dreams as much as it is knowing where your home is. Sometimes, we get so lost trying to make a living we forget to make a life. Being a captain must be great, that 6 figure salary is nothing to be ashamed of, but I’d take a hard working wife and a healthy child over that salary any day. Money is temporary, but your legacy will last forever.
I know I’ll make a terrific Captain, but the fact of the matter is, I’ve accepted I can’t do every single silly thing I want to accomplish in life. I have to make choices, even harder than that, I have to be happy with the choices I make. With that being said, I think I am doing pretty well. I’m not saying this life is easy, but I do believe you’ll find some solace in the way I look at you. You see, sailors admire the Polaris, the north Star, that’s how they find their way home. When I look at you, that’s what I see. I see my way home.
Everyone knows your face, but no one know who you are. Everyone knows how valuable you are, but no one really can give an explanation as to why or what makes your legacy go on. Everyone looks at you but no one sees you for who you are, they don’t know how to look at you. They don’t know your chest is shaped as a heart. They don’t know how inquisitive you are. They don’t see how you’re trying to escape your canvas but the painter is holding you down. They don’t know that the horizon is the center piece of your beauty, that when you look at the painting as a whole, that you can actually see your smile. The don’t know you don’t have a ring on your finger. They don’t realize your right hand is placed over your left to signify your strength and diligence. They don’t see your detail, your beauty, how ever your modest clothing tells a story of who you are.
But that’s the problem with masterpieces like you, although we all see you, no one really takes the time to find out why you are the way you are. I did, and just the way you are is perfect to me. I’d hang you in every room in my house. I wouldn’t ever take you down. I’d position you so you could see the sun rises every morning over the marsh in my back yard. I’d position you on my wall at just the perfect height to where my eye sight was directly in line with your horizon so I could see you smile every day.
26 years and 107 days old today. Ive recently realized im maxed out in my life at this point in time. I know where i am at, i just dont know what to do. What do i focus on? I know how to get out of debt, i like to use a strategy known as the “snowball affect”. Thats when you pay off your first bill and snowball that premium into your next bill and you keep rplling funds into your final biggest debt. Cool, got that down. I found happiness in life can be as simple as minding my own business, more importantly than that, happiness can also be accepting people for who they are. All in all, everyone has a purpose and its none of my business what that purpose is, its just my business to contribute my life to them if needed. Lets talk careers, work hard and know success comes more from what you do not know appossed to what you do know. That was a big one for me but again, its figured out. My career isnt where i want it, but i have the patients to know its coming. Everything will eventually fall into place if im diligent and eager for my next realization, if im ready for my next triumph… Which brings me to my recent and most significant realization thus far; Am i maxed out? I dont mean over loaded with stress, im referring to my experiance of learning in this point in my life… Ive been with my company for two years in the deck department and ive learned one thing and thats how to make my Captains cup of coffee the same color as Alicia Keys, a smudge of milk and one heeping teaspoon of sugar. Ive learned and experianced all I can in my department. Now theres still room to grow in life and in the wheel house, i spend copious amounts of time at the helm and i love it. My problem is, my title remains deckhand and i feel that resorts other people to limit my capabilities based on the bubble im trapped in of being a deckhand. Enough is enough sometimes and i feel like im loosing points on my IQ scale every day i work on deck. Im just not growing anymore and that kills me. Life is about progress, exploring every single thing, the pursuit of happiness and im maxed out where I’m at right now. But what do i do with it? I cant rely on people in my life for growth, theyre maxed out too. They lack the desire to set apart from the crowd. They’re okay with being ordinary… i cant be that or blend in there, i stick out like a sore thumb and get presumed as someone trying to be better than them (in a bad way). What do i do? Where do i go? The best conversation i have now-a-days is with a magnificent 31 year old woman and history books. Yes, i talk back to the author and trust me he’s listening more than some people ive met in my life. I crave knowledge and i crave experiances but where do i find them? I am so exhausted with being a ambitious person and being stuck in a world of mediocrity. Theres a life out there for me to thrive in and i will find it… One day at a time i suppose.
Heres to the overachievers.